How much is my skin tone worth to you?

I've been meaning to talk about this for sometime now...I work with clients from the colonial world and having been there recently I think I can be at liberty to say this...(well It is my blog and I would have said it anyways :P)...we Indians are the biggest hypocrites around. Now I borrow this phrase from a dear friend who loves the country just as much as I do but nonetheless falls into this category!!! 

Yes we are a country obsessed with fairness and all the beauty and virtue the fair tone symbolizes. Yes we will go large extents to make sure we fall in this so called beautiful category. Yes we will not let our kids play out in the sun and drown them in sunscreen before they leave and ubtan after they are back. Yes we will photo shop our pics to an extent that all our features are lost in the myriads of the contrast and brightness of light. Yes we will have saffron-laced milk 10 times a day before the kid is born and then force it have apples and beets for rosy cheeks (true story that...ah my good old childhood days). Yes we don't believe a word those fairness creams guys dish out, even if it's John Abraham speaking his need for them, but we will still go get the newest tube available in the market. And yes we will put up matrimonial ads like this to show civilization and progress are not 2 words that go hand in hand with the Dravidian society "Wanted, milky white tall beautiful girl, 18 years of age, from decent family" (that ad is demeaning at soooooo many levels that I'll make another post out of the whip lashes!!!)

We do all of this, but I don't wish to understand why do all this. The need to look gorgeous lies in every woman and the urge to look handsome lurks with every guy. Imagine a charcoal black aunty in the famed 'Mutai' pick saree? You cringe at the image right? Now imagine Katrina Kaif in the same thing...some of you men are already in la-la land right? I get it, even to get to the inner beauty most of us need to get past the outer beauty. It's OK. Manufacturing defect that god himself sent us with so it's all his fault not our kinds'. What I'd like to know is just cause you aren't fair toned does that make you any less eligible for the respect you deserve for your calibre and talents? 

I see this everyday and it hasn't stopped to boggle me even after 3 years now. Read some excerpts

Mail to the colleague(akka moi), not a subordinate even, an equal, sitting right next to you, with the access of a chatting tool and vocal chords that blare out for every other thing under the sun.

Subject Line : Send the last week's I-AM-STILL-ALIVE report ASAP!!! EOM

Body : Nothing

Signature: Bland like the character

Mail to the lucky blokes sitting across 7 seas,again with access to the chatting tool and a brain that has segmented the upper class from the shudra class

Subject Line :  Last week's status report

Body : 

Hi Esteemed Gora Sahab,  

Kindly send over the I-AM-STILL-ALIVE report of last week immediately as I have some tasks to finish!!!!!!!!!!

Signature: Still bland like the character

OK I get that you are severely handicapped with English words in particular and common sense in general, that's no sin , it's OK, and you also think exclamation marks are indicative of your authority (the more the better types) but does it also mean that you have scant regard for the actual people who work with you, who you interact with on a daily basis and need to get along with  (not boss around)? Does it not mean that you are willing to bend over backwards in every form there is just cause the guy sitting elsewhere was not as blessed with melanin as the guys sitting around you are? The politeness and contriteness has to come oozing out only for the Goras and not for Brownies? And whatever you need maybe, don't you think others would need an explanation for your demands, especially when there is no direct reporting structure, however crippled you might be with your vocab? I used to seriously wonder why IBM spent so much on 'Communication Skills' training now I know but alas if only the people who actually need it knew it.

Why are people this way? Are the firang asses/arses better tasting than the native ones that you lick people enjoy licking them more? Does respect and common courtesy have to deteriorate according to the skin tone of an individual, in this gradient? You agree with me right Nigel(the famed Gora Sahab of our team)?

                            ------>----------------->---------------------->

Like I said, it boggles me! How we the so-called educated society still hold on to the age old class system and then cry foul when a guy from the colonial world so much as disapproves with what you had to say? Well never mind the Indian he/she anyways doesn't get a say in this, but still think about it...were we not ruled because we let people rule us? On the same note are we really free when we can't give up on the age old prejudices? I've been to the other world and I've seen how everybody is treated equally (like how it is professed in our Preamble); I've seen people being respected for who they are and not for what skin colour there genes gifted them. Make no mistake I don't say that we aren't looked down upon by the firangs, not all do it but do we really have to blame them? When we see some saying 'fraaaaandsips' do we not put up blogs about it? Then why point fingers only at the others and call them bigots? And honestly for the hypocritic society that we are shouldn't we really be looked down upon? I do and I don't care whose mature sensibilities I affect by saying so OK...so go shove!!!

Enough profundity(and profanity) for the day huh? What prompted this, I've found a new love for skirts (never mind that the boy thinks girls who wear skirts are sluts (*correction---- the boy wants me to say 'girls.... are perceived as sluts, don't ask me by whom)...yep I've punched him for it girls...so let your guard down) whilst I was at UK and now where them regularly to work. One such day stopped by at a local eatery for some idli-vada-sambhar trio and boy oh boy the celebrity treatment I got!!! This is tiny eatery mind you with like just 2 tables, and I have a special waiter waiting right there at my beck and call!!! Not that I wanted it or enjoyed the attention  (it was after all for some skin showing below my knees) but it prompted Paulie who was with me to say..."full memsahab treatement"!!! 

Would I get the same exalted treatment if I were a mother with one kid tugging at my pallu and the other dripping mucus, riding atop my shoulder, if I were wearing a saree torn at many a place and a non existent blouse? Mind you I can stay pay the very same 28 bucks in Indian rupees, which memsahab just did, for the food? No I think not. Yep hypocrites in all the sense of the word!!! 

On a not so cheerful note...cheers to my alomondy-chocolaty skin tone :D... I love it...I get to carry of an attitude on the dusky can: SEXY :P

mantener la sonrisa

 

P.S (What's EOM? End of message. I swear I'm sick of these acronyms!!! And yes I get the priveldeg of knowing that the message ended even before it started...I'm so grateful GAAD!)  

Liketh..no Liketh?

Aloha!!!!!!!!!!                                                                                                              This actually shouldn't even be counted as a post...but I'm shameless and it's my blog...so what the heck :D....

Made so many changes to the blog now I've lost track and my old template...I still need to figure out the best colour settings and how to get the pics to be outlined...but enough xml and html for a week....I'm leaving this template for a week, after which I'll change it to a lighter template with way too much girly motifs for my liking but I think that would be the preferred option.

So you guys can act all important and let me know how you the new look is. You can be honest no worries but don't forget the name I go by!!! 

And oh what does the picture have to do with this...nothing at all...but it's everything my sordid life is right now. My dad is currently breathing  down my neck to stop working  Yep, I've maintained the image of - if I'm on the comp I'm working- so I shall stop with this baloney now :P

ADIOS AMIGOS

 

Bring them back !!!

I'm chuuuuper excited...I have the first interesting thing to do for the month...write about me :D...after all I am my favourite person! I must warn you..Sunday brunches bring out the worst in me...for more 2 min-Maggi-induced delusions read on...

Borrowed this from Divya.

Will get working on this soon enough but it won't be a 10 day continuous thingy...that would be too much me and I can be tolerated only in small doses..trust me!!! Spaceman Spiff to show you my gratitude here are some of my fav Old Hindi songs. Yenjaaaaaaay

Lyrics have always been my weakness. A song might have a great melody but it won't score with me if it's got backwas rehashed lyrics (Like that Uriyin Uriye re-make in FORCE.....EEyuck!!!).. The one I love here:

'Kisse ka pyaa leke tum, naya jahan basaooge...yeh shyaam jab bhi ayegi tum humko yaad aaoge.... '...need I say more?

I have a mini orgasm every time I see a jeep...I love the wind in my hair and I love sun roofs in cars and convertibles in general..(Machi our deal is still on right?)...Anyhoo I always sing this song with great gusto...makes for a great Antakshari starter and gets everybody into a great sing-songy boisterous mood :D...so what you waiting for ...sing along 'Mere Sapno ki'...Actually you know what it's no good without the jeep so shut it!!!

Have you ever noticed that songs of melancholy or betrayal or loss etc... are the ones which seem to be resplendent with amahazing lyrics? Makes me wonder does the Brain control the heart or does the heart do the bossing around?  I can't single out any particular line in this song but the start of it gets me ruminating always...oh man....'Tere bina zindagi ge se koi shikava to nahi....Tere bina zidagi bhi lekin zindagi thoo nahi'.....something like 'With or Without you' ?

I've always wanted to have a summer retreat house in Darjeeling. This song always reminds of how far away I am from realizing that dream!!! On that note let's take a refreshing break with this song,, shall we? 'Aisa koi saathi ho, aisa koi premi ho..pyaas dilki bhuja jaye...'

An absolute classic this!!! I don't know if this guy was truly a mega star or not, but the songs he got really made him one!!! What can I say about this song...guys if you still have not lost interest, try this sometimes...doesn't have to be this mushy but trust me you'll get a lot of brownie points even if you attempt it ;)...'O mere dil ke chaain'...Platinum ho ya gold plated...'Chaain aye mere dil ko dua ke jiye'

Ah being in love and the nautankis and takraars!!! My mother is crazy about this song, she even the same dress Asha Parek is wearing here. She and Dad can be as far away from the song and the romancing though but I sure know where I got the love for Old Hindi Songs. from.. BTW baby 'Ke tum ispe ho itrate ke me peeche hun soau iltajaye liye...je mein khush hun mere soona...jhoot kya hai sach kaho na...'

This song is so so  so romantic...'Pyar jo toota...saath jo choota... chaand na chamkega kabhi' ...I've always wanted a love-dance song in the rain like this...Aamir you could have chosen me for 'Zoobi Doobi' know?...I even sent out an early application..but no everybody wants Miss Zero Size only...coming back to the song at hand...I don't think I'll be as shy as Nargis here to share the umbrella but this song always make me tear up....right time for a short break.....See you soon at Radio hmmmmm Radio...hmmm...gimme sometime I'll come up with it...let's move on for now.

Hasn't it happened to you that you feel like killing yourself and then after a loooong phone call, some chocolates/flowers/coffees/shoes(in my case)/gizmos/comp-games later you are full of zest to pump it out? 'Koi na rokhe dilki udhaan ko'

'Duniya ne humko diya kya, duniya se humne liya kya? Hum sab ki parvah kare kyun sabne hamara kiya kya?' Motto of my life and I live it every moment of my life ..so Gara-eyes go ahead recruit more in your 'I-hate-Priyanka' Club, I'll send you guys donations for those sad-ass club meetings you guys have during your busy weekends :P

I agree this song is nauseating sometimes, but it is such a stark contrast to the crap dished out nowadays in  Bolly-croak!!! We all, ahem correction, those of us who are lucky enough to have found somebody for whom we can write letters to, will relate to this. Well the letter doesn't have to be Choc-guaint it Guruji? ..'Likhe jo Khat tujhe'...

Drawing the show to an end, (I know I know...there are so many many more...but  I still have more shows guys) I leave the listeners of Radio Violet ( WHAT? there can be a Radio Indigo but not Violet? Get away you bigots!!!) with an absolute treat...I love this song in all accounts...I don't know who is cuter here...Mumtaaz or Shammi...and oh FYI I've been looking for a dancing partner for this song to put up a live preformance sometime soon...anybody interested...don't worry I'm an exceptional dancer, I'll completely overshadow you on the stage so basically all you need to do is imitate Shammi and his hand movements..wokays? for now go 'tan nan nana nana'

Time to wind up...So long listeners, doubling up as readers...do tune in to the next show of Radio Violet (damn it's beginning to sound lame to me as well), same blog, any time, every time...You know the frequency, it's mine and it's difficult to match :P....

Apki host cum ghost

 

P.S (to narrow it down to only these songs was probably hardest things I've ever had to do on my show, next time I'll take live requests so do leave your comments and dedications ;P)

P.P.S (I had so much fun listening to these songs, hope you guys do too...I've left links for each song, just in case the U-tube plugin decides to throw around some attitude.)              

FOR THE LOVE OF DOG!!!

Something about me and an all picture post...I just don't get enough of them. Was low yet again, surprise surprise!!! I couldn't manage to convince an important person, who I am and what I want, and I just let it be. It's totally unlike me to let things be, but this year has been showing more facets of me , which I never knew existed, with each passing day. I never knew I could take criticism in my stride, I did; I never knew I could invoke a hate mail post, I did; I never knew If try so hard I'd still fail, but I did. 

I'm not low cause of the failure, aha aha, I'm low cause I'm not getting answers and it's driving me insane!!! Was talking to  the bwoy and he being the avid dog lover that he is, was talking about 'Honey', a brown Doberman his cousin has at home. Brought back fond memories of 'Rani'. We had her long long ago, and the quite little stub of hers would do the jatka's and matka's that could teach that Kareena lady a thing or 2 ... she was gorgeous...black shiny coat, healthy build, a snarl that would make you shit and pee together and love that was so pure, it would make anybody her slave!!! It also helped, that she was the only one apart from me, who hated my chubby little brat of a sister :P... I have 7 cats/kittens and there are little bundles of joy but a dog is a dog. He/She will bounce around and tear everything apart in sight, eat everything in sight and then poop stinky goo all over the house...but these rascals give you the one thing  that nobody else can. ABSOLUTE DEDICATION, COMFORT and LOVE.  

I miss having a dog soooooooooooo much, I just wish I could somehow get my Jadoo back and more along with her. Mommy I swear I'll clean up the poo everyday, I swear I'll pay for the medicines (I was in college back then with 200 bucks as my pocket money for the month, sorry if I had to hound you sometimes), I swear I'll take him running everyday, I swear I won't let him rip your chappal this time and I swear I'll never let you take him away from me again!!! 

Attention: All those who wanna a make a difference in your life and want to go to heaven, here's your lucky chance. One way ticket to Utopia in return of these....no pressure at all... take your pick, but TAKE your pick and pass it on!!!

He might make me sneeze the whole day and slurp all over my precious pumps but that look of being a puppy trapped in a dog's body is worth all the trouble I say ;)

Imagine taking this one out on walks...I can be sure that not one creep will brush across me so-called-accidentally!!! The face might actually work to my advantage to lure the fools into the bait-....muhahaha...

 You can get me 2 of the same breed or you can get me 2, who will only each other need

You can get me the one who sit beside me as if the whole world came tumbling down, just to prove my point,

Or you can get me the one who will teach me what being 2 is again!!!

You can get me the one, for whom I am THE one,

Or you can get me one, for whom being a puppy will always remain fun!!!

tener cuidado

 

P.S (What does it make you, when you say that the reason that you didn't have time to put up something decent on your blog was the notion that you were so very busy in your work and social life, then only manage to take a  pitiful dig at a person who was only hoping to get out some good read out of you, and then do exactly the same thing you did in the last 38 posts.....talk about love and lust, yet again...in yet another form: a pathetic loser, a demented writer or a basic liar? Nope it makes you my follower and an avid believer in increasing the count on both the views tab and the followers list...thanks Gara eyes :D... I never thought you were capable of admiring me this much...means a lot to me...honest!!!)  

P.P.S ( That P.S was long enough to be a mini post but I'm kinda getting used to loooooong comments so bear with me!!! BTW thanks PV, Machi and Arjit for helping me with the day. I think I did ok. You guys are great :D)                                                                                                                                                       

Effigies I shall burn this Dussehera!!!

I think I’ve had one too many putric acid spewing blogs in the recent living memory so it’s time I have a nice big kit-kat! But can’t resist the urge to get into the festive mood can I? It being Dasara and all and me missing school for the hols and all, I have to have to vent, yes this time it is venting, so I’m doing it the traditional way ;).

Some of the people who by accident sauntered in to my life, some others shamelessly-obstinately-soon to be-fatally, refuse to go away and few others who I have in life only cause of the sins I have committed in my previous 9 lives I’d like to poof up in Volcanic ashes. Ok a small deviation here, imagine reading this and the past few posts, if one day I get controversial enough to be made a item on the idiot box and somebody wastes time psychoanalyzing my twisted brain, yes yes the Sahana induced syndrome, just imagine the field day they will have reading my posts!!! 

Intruders: This is a general classification of the noisy boys next door…emerged from the heart of Reddy clan these 2 legged-creatures have a hearing impediment I think, any time of the day  the volume of the TV or Radio is over 150 decibel…even at 1 cuckoo a.m.!!! I strongly suspect any person who isn’t deaf yet, will reach for the pistol, after listening to the music they play!!! And each song has to be played a minimum of 64 times (eyes popped out from the head and rolling around on the floor). I’ll be busy trying to be Khumbhakasurani and these cretins completely oblivious to the inconvenience they cause eat-talk-burp-snore-cavort unbearably LOUDLY.  Venketeshwara, why did you ever create “Brahmachari’ phase of life? Do you really hate women thaaaaaaaat much!!!! I swear on all the wealth that has been accumulated in your name, if I lose more sleep, I will throw these boys into the cleansing pyre, even if they are miles away from Telanga.  

Unbearablo-Lecherosarous: I ask the guy at the pantry in office for an egg puff, he talks to my boobs. I ask the auto fellow if he will come to Malleshwaram, he will take a good look at the mid riff and then say in the most annoying tone ‘Illa amma’ (rejection basically). I can’t walk alone on a deserted road even at 8 in the morning, my ass has been much too spanked!!! And I’m not even that blessed you know body wise. I have a kick ass metabolism which keeps me hour glassy even after I’ve eaten a whole buffalo, but pahlease all this attention is way too much duuudees!!! Enough is enough. I get to hear from my small circle of well wishers why dress provocatively if you don't want all this, to whom I shoot back, does it matter if I were in a saree or burkha? Why should I curb my expression cause of those eyes which follow me everywhere? Won't I just draw them out with my claws!!! You disgusting vile filthy human beings, If I were a real dragon, you would all be charred by now.  

B&B's at work: Guys get a life!!! I am not there to screw you or over you. I'm their to enjoy my work. You goddamn  better let me do it. It's not my fault I am bestowed with oodles of confidence...the awesomeness is in born! Yes I am in your face, Yes I can be rude, yes I sure am wily, but if only you noticed I can be nice,s oft , friendly, cool and caring too. I don't respect people who can't do the same so you can go jump of any damn cliff before you expect me doing so, but start giving the bitching a rest will you.?The Satan has come visiting me in the rehashed form of woman, and boy oh boy...making my life living hell, in a form only we women are capable of doing. I've never hated, yes I won't use detest cause the felling is not mild, somebody as much as I do this thing. You cost me my friend and I'll die before I forget or forgive that sin. How can somebody be so blinded by jealousy, mob mentality and sheer dumb ego is beyond me but you are setting a great great example of who I will tell myself in years to come, however successful I will be, I never ever become!!! You guys have been hard to get rid of, like the roaches of the world, but you have got be purified in the lava spewed from Etna!!!

Ghosts of my childhood: You refuse to go away. You haunt me and terrify me. You make me think 100 times before I even so much as smile at a guy. I keep up the brave front not wanting you to destroy me again, but you...aaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh...haven't you tortured me enough? Have you taken away my blessed childhood from me, forced me to grow up at the age of 5 and left me battered already. Why stay with me more? What sadistic pleasure do you derive by reminding, every now and then, that the  girl species is the most vulnerable out there who can be eve-teased, molested and raped just for the heck of it!!! I want to live, live freely, live openly, live my life the way it's meant to be lived.....Hope this cataclysmic fire makes you finally go away and may I RIP!!!

这么久

 

P.S (Though since I was venting might as well let it all out. Don't ask me what B&B's, you guys are intelligent enough, go figure.)

P.P.S (Stevey died today I hear, may he also RIP, I wasn't a big fan, if not him atleast his company is an icon so toast to you great guy!!!) 


P.P.P.S (I also hear RCB won a match in style....Way to go guys :D)

CRAZY IDEAS

 

Just yesterday I was telling somebody I haven’t met any guy who is a Capricorn and I think God (who BTW has suddenly taken an interest in me) was within ear shot. Lo behold I got a Mr Arjit on my blog. How he landed here I know not but I was genuinely pleased when I read his comment. Was grinning ear-ear when I read this: Virgin Blogging

It’s strange how we blogger birds (NOT CHICKS!!!) flock together….I was just thinking today that when I wrote mellow, day to day posts, I would get what 4-5 comments max with my avid followers leaving behind their pearls of gyaan and sometimes the brick bats or sexist remarks which are promptly added into the garbage dump. But when I write trash about other trash  I read on other blogs I get whoa lot of opinions and a handful of new followers!!! WAH RE DUNIYA!!!

Now I already implicitly follow most of the guidelines the Virgin boy/man/alien/self-proclaimed blogger awards-hater/Swami Arjit-no-anand (ok ok I’ll stop) has mentioned in his latest post, so not much scope but it I’ll still follow Arjit Guruji’s crazy ideas and blabber on.

Pravachan 1….open letter huh?(I'm sure a the end of this you will be inspired for one Guruji) I’ll write an open epic if needed but why in fuck's name will I waste that much precious time on other non precious people!!! But still letter huh? I have a Delhi boy in my life and I haven’t written a letter to him in a looong time and he has become much too complacent owing to that fact. So yep will do one for him soon…Can you believe this? On the previous post, the other bloggers/drifters took it in their stride (muah you guys) but this non-blogging leviathan was giving me a lecture on ‘Freedom of expression!!!'

Pravachan 2…. HOW DARE YOU!!! EDWARD doesn’t need to please me THAT way dude, he is good enough just the way he is OK, LEAVE HIM ALONE? Shut it. I would wanna start an anti-Ducati/Ferrai or anti-Angelina or whatever the hell that you ‘Y’ chromosome bearers hold close to your throbbing full sized, slightly misplaced and deformed, aortic pumps!!! (sorry about the euphemism I think it’s a crime to say ‘men posses a heart’ ;))  

Pravachan 3….Alas!!! One of the banal points repeated oft in IBM, inn-fuckin-vation. Imagine a world where everybody could innovate? Would there be names like Galileo,  Einstein, Frankenstein, that Zuckerberg guy, falana falana…now don’t give me that shit of invention and innovation are not the same…not everybody has a medulla oblongata  with that many convolutions…manufacturing defect!!!

Pravachan 4….Ok..trust me on this…nothing invites hordes like controversies…go against anybody and everybody just for the heck of it, even if you don’t who they are…There is always 70% chance that people will come back and tell you where to drown yourself.   

Pravachan 5, Pravachan 11 and Pravachan 13 (all variants of the samething: talk non stop and make partial to no sense…guruji point well established ;))….I’m a die hard feminist for reasons better know only to me. So no prob!!! I think all the rapists in the world should be publicly humiliated and relieved of their vital possessions. I think those men who use acid to prove a point should be stoned to death.  I think men are ogres crossed with cockroaches with traces of dodo chromosomes!!! Yep I do.

Pravachan 6 and Pravachan 12….I already did this in the previous 2 posts. I don’t suffer from chronic clinical depression so melancholy doesn’t come pouring out that easily.  But I've never spoken about my X have I? I’ve had my fair share of relationships, most ended amiably and amicably. In most cases I’m still friends with the X’s, all baring except one. The one and only !!! Mr Narayan, you might have had 1000 of issues with me, you might have been in love with your X GF(who I now hear is your wife, I wasn’t invited to the wedding of course) when you asked me out,  you might have been a gem waiting to be discovered in the shit pot and polished in Ontario, but what you did has earned you a place in hell, for sure. You didn’t have the balls to talk it out and end the relationship, (after 3 days of everybody in college talking about it and incessant tears all this dick mustered is “Pinku you know what happened right?”, it took all my energy not to shove my drafter up his ass but I just walked away), you turned my friends against me, left me all alone in a class of 23 and weren’t even there to help when that whole shit of ORKUT happened…How do you ever sleep peacefully a night I will never know!!!!If I ever meet you again, you will get the deserving and much prolonged slap, I cross my heart!!!

Pravachan 7…..I refuse it on principal…unfunny comics!!! Oxymoron to the core and totally against the essence of me ;)

Pravachan 8…..Now why would I do that? I just found that my creative juices can be corrosive out here and mellifluous on DOV :D

Pravachan 9…..I’m no pro at this…I hardly take any photographs, have the worst cam there ever is and detest being photographed. Chintan wanna help me out here?

Pravachan 10….This needs sometime…I’m already a legend at work. The only person in the world who is branded as not approachable when she was in UK by people who were in India.  Yep concept of telecommunication is lost on frigging assholes who ironically enough  work in the telecom industry. But I shall return. Holiday on Thus shall be out to good use (evil laughter)

Phew this was fun :D…Guru extraordinaire  what more gurudakshina do you need than a whole post dedicated to you and your purportedly famous discourses :P

Tot de volgende kee

P.S. (This is the first ever I have spoken about the X. I’m not proud of even the association with him, my single biggest regret in life was saying a ‘YES’ to that goof ball!!! And Machi before you say hope you feel better, trust me these are not my rants or vents, I will only feel better when I taste sweet retribution!!! And that's 'until next time' in Dutch that I have signed of today with)

P.P.S (I reply back to each comment people, and like a moron sometimes leaves questions also in those replies, if it’s not too much to ask of you please do go back to the replies, who knows I might have just made your day :P)

P.P.P.S (Don’t wanna to put up a disclaimer in 2 consecutive posts, Arjit,  but absolutely no malice intend whatsoever…all this attitude emerged from this statement “Keep writing, and we will keep reading” :P)

Verbal Diarrhoea or Verbal Constipation

Statutory Warning: People who continue to read on, especially bloggers, do so at your own risk. One of the 2 things might happen after reading this piece of non-fictional work: you might get offended and start putting up  posts worth reading or you might get offended and stop writing!!! Either ways it works for me.

The title and the warning must have been sufficient to indicate the nature of this post. I sit here on a totally faltoo Sunday morning, locked up inside my house for want of people to associate with and the only company I have are the blogs I so earnestly follow. The net connection as expected acted up so I am in a filthy-foul-gargoyle mood but the people who drove me into this mood are my fellow bloggers. Yaar basic concept of blogging is to enjoy what you write first!!! How can you possible enjoy the trash that you (not all but select few among the bloggers that I follow) are dishing out nowadays?

There is a guy who is totally acting like an MCP, who instead of his prior balanced posts is now veering towards shoddy grounds of comparisons; an excerpt : ‘Owning pets is like having a housewife without reaping the benefits!!!’ Mind you this isn’t original in any which way, copied from yesterday’s edition of Deccan Herald, but the farm-fresh-still-moist-goop that follows the tagline is unmistakably his!!! Baaburao do you realize your being offensive to canines as well as women in that post? Agreed freedom of expression is a fundamental right the constitution has unwittingly bestowed on you, but jam-ayella ‘Bass karo ye atyachaar’!!!

Then there is this aunty (not you Red) who for some reason has been given trucks loads of blogger awards, but I fail to see how they are helping her. Maybe she too had a peak of glory once but sadly the nadir is visible and it’s time to throw in her boots I feel. Lady: Who cares if your flab is sticking out by one more mm, haven’t you already told all of us that a gazillion times now?  Who gives a rat’s ass if yet again today you messed up the daal-kichdi!!! Take the hint, you know not how to cook, but you sure knew how to write, so please get back to that…I enjoyed your musings once upon a time (sob sob)…And for heaven’s sake stop replying with your gharelu jhagdas in replies to comments. Some things are called private for a reason you see!!!

I’ve found the concept of blogger awards quite quirky actually. The intention might have been good, eons ago, but today with every Eena, Meena and Deeka getting it, I feel it’s lost the charm. I might kick up a hornet’s nest for saying this, added to the fact that I adorn any at the moment, but allow me to present my case dearies. I witnessed this deluded creature get the ‘Versatile Blogger’ award. Now the irony in this lies that the past 38 posts of this person was about the same dam thing!!! Love and Lust…OMG I mean OH MY FRIGGING GOD…..how can you say the same thing again and again and again…yet another again in different forms and words…you haven’t convinced yourself yet that you aren’t in love or out of it, you sure as hell can’t convince anybody else!!! This whole pendulum game of ‘I love him. I love him not’ has reached a point of nausea and for Pete’s sake…stop obsessing about your hotness. You couldn’t be any colder or wetter than you are right now. In the longer run men like women with character, not those who wear nothing but their bra and saunter in to work on a Friday!

Congratulations you 3 and few others!!! You have successfully established a fact: all of you are suffering from either Verbal Diarrhoea or Verbal Constipation and in the last case both!!! I wish I could offer you a blogger award, I’ll work on it in the background, mother promise(I’m good at editing), but for now I’m off your followers list, lest the disease be contagious!!!

hasta la próxima vez

P.S: Sorry junta I’m not normally this vitriolic, some people just bring out the best in me what can I say!!! 

Somewhere over the rainbow!!!

It's been a horrendous month and I'm GLAAAAAAAAD it's over....not a single day has passed when I haven't shed a tear..but somehow today I feel buoyant...not sure what I did but I found my kohl lined eyes back and the urge to smile...The willingness to deck up and the desire to live life the way it's supposed to be lived :D...I let go of something and it made me feel so light that I almost feel I can fly!!! 

I've loved this song from the time I was a little girl...easy simple lyrics with profound meaning, I enjoyed singing it in the choir at school and love it just as much today....I still nurse an ambition to get behind a cockpit one day and soar above where the world below me looks like a maze and the world above me a haze.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly.
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?

Beautiful isn't it? I've learnt something over the past few days...everybody has troubles...everybody deals with it differently...but if you carry your problems on your shoulders, with you everywhere you go, they will only slow you down...Life isn't a sprint race to buzz past it in a jiffy...It's to be enjoyed and savored and every living moment is precious..Why share it with troubles when you can share it with friends over a bottle of red wine ;-)

2 videos of the song I found. One is handled beautifully...something about the sepia tone just haunts me...but the pace can really put me to sleep...the other has these beautiful locales(I think it's Maldives) and has a more bouncy feel :D

 

For some odd reason I couldn't put up the other video so just leaving the link here Over the Rainbow

 So how are you today?

Mit freundlichen Grüßen

The week that was....

It's been a starange starange week!!! Ran by in a jiffy yet I felt every minute of this week weigh down on my tiny slender shoulders. Majority of my life is spent in office and it doesn’t help my case that I'm the shepherd for a bunch of absolutely spineless deluded sheep.  More often than not I'm not I'm doing my tasks along with the tasks of 6 others'...work had always been interesting but now with my bud being all conscious that he shant be purportedly biased towards me now that he is a manager I've lost the one confidant that I had at work. I've always been a task master and I truly believe that any company however crappy it is, doesn’t pay you to warm the seats or to play Farmville on the intranet!!! I've got the epithet of being the office-bitch for this on the ever popular FB as well but such things never bothered me the least bit. The year started of great, with some great trips and attending some lovely weddings. But the UK trip was both a bonanza and a curse. I haven't been able to adjust back to life ever since I got back or people aren't letting me adjust back to it. I'm now an alien in the very same team that I have nurtured over the past 3 years. Life just hasn't been the same since June and I can't help but hope it would stop being so freaking murky.  

I've always been a person who has spoken her mind so it peeves me big time when people twist around my words even when I have been harry-winston-crystal-clear! Working with assholes, chauvinists, dimwits and unprofessionals, has always been there but now I'm having to deal with another class of people : 'The Touch me nots!! More on these not so sublime species in the next post but surging forward... as it's been off late I'm having way too many arguments with the one guy I respect a lot at work and it was bothering to no end. Late night work and crazy deadlines weren't helping the cause either so I decided to take a break mid week, went for a movie, did some candle shopping and bought me self a yummy choc soap (which is so making my morning baths wonderful) and off course some stationery….:D...the retail therapy sure did help but I did the cardinal sin of checking my official mails after I got back...all the therapy went down the drain...just like phusssssssssssh....!!! 

I don't know what is it with people and them having issues with me? In this case I wasn't even around to associate with them for them to be this way towards me. I was across seven seas with barely any interaction with these people yet they chose to ignore the fact that I am a lead and have the authority to voice my opinion. I'm younger than most people around me in the team and being a lead to people whose collective  work experience is double that of mine doesn't help... it's natural for people to be this way with me, I'm kinda used to it now, but what I don't get is what about the life experience of these people? Why won't they get past their stain-grained mirrors and shed their biased opinions...I've always used introspection to help me out at difficult times but in this case I draw a blank...so called senior people acting like inane monkeys jumping around at the silliest of things and making a mountain out of a mole hill is just beyond my humble understandings!!!

Anyhoo Friday was a overall good: I got the much awaited band promotion (in layman terms I'm promoted) which makes my salary exactly the double of what it was when I first started work :D :D :D YAY me...I also hear from my manager that I will henceforth do a different role from what I have been doing for THREE long years now. It's what people call moving up a rung in the corporate ladder but I'm having to leave behind my baby...the one I toiled and toiled for...It's going to be so so difficult; you have no idea...but I agree it's time to move on...it's time for the fledglings to sprout wings and soar and I'm sure they will...they've after all been guided by me ;-)...This new move would mean lesser rendezvous with the 'devil' which would mean automatically my stress levels should come down but I'm going to have to turn around a team whose reputation and morale has been flushed with the sewage. Challenge it will be and the task master shall get to work starting tomorrow!!! Wish me luck people...I'm gonna need it...

The weekend was decent. I managed to clean my room a teensy bit; result all my books/novels are now neatly lined up in the shelves and are well protected (a whole shelf is currently taken up by the books on food :D)...

Before I sign off I HAVE to mention this. 

>>>>Have you ever seen 2000 odd comments for a single post in a span of 2 days?

>>>>Have you ever seen anybody get media coverage including newspaper articles for a post they wrote in 15 mins?

>>>>Have you ever seen/heard shrinks psycho-analyse posts put up on the blogs which is also closely followed on FB and Twitter?

Well I have a new found respect for a blogger: Sahana. She has this amazing satire, with excellent usage of words interspruced with brutal facts which are laid down in a no nonsense manner. I'm totally hooked on to her blog (The Madarasan's saga)!!!  Don't miss the recent posts, comments, responses to the comments and her awesome take on the multitudes of MCPs' our country abounds in!!!

P.S:  The twitterrati and the FB mongers are a species of creatures I will never understand!!! I can't fathom what pleasure do these people get by following somebody's life so much so that they literally hound a girl and issue death threats. If these specimens have the freedom of expression and can call others, the colourful names that they have so very efficiently come up with from their oh-so-limited vocab, doesn’t Sahana also have a right to voice her opinion?

Post Scripts

P.S:  I've always been a little weird, right from the Inception :-p...blame it on the booze at Thesario... haven't heard of it? GK very bad I see (cluck cluck)... it's  a planet in the galaxy next to the milky way about 2679 light years away ...that's all...Come visit me sometimes, I go there when need to control the sun god and his temperament :-p

P.P.S : It's difficult being my freind but it's much worse being my enemy. Trust me I have extensive proofs for this!!!

P.P.P.S : Do you know how much I hate Shetty boys? DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES much. They are the biggest mummy-ke-pallu-mein-ghusse-rehne walle nincompoops. And don't even get me started on their attitude!!!

P.P.P.P.S : You know how frisky little kittens play hide and seek? I absolutely enjoy that. 2 (actually one is a grown cat, but he is still a kid inside) are at it now...totally made my day.

P.P.P.P.P.S: Men are attracted to me because of my confidence, but when it in any way  makes them feel like imbeciles, then I have 'ISSUES'!!!

P.P.P.P.P.P.S: Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.(I don't why I thought of this now...complete rambling only today...mummy morning tea kodi please)

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S: This is all too common in Bendakalooru, (don't wanna generlize cause I hate that as well) - Pandals right in the middle of the road, (porki boys of the colony suddenly are all decent), beautiful idol swith lovely decorations and blaring, I mean BLARING in the back ground is 'O poodu', 'Munaguru Malaye', 'Tum tho Tehere Pardesi', 'Boom Boom'(yes yes the Vengaboys one!!!)...I'll let you in on a secert...the thought process here is: "If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining." 

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S: I am a total colour fanatic which a 180-180 plot for purple in my heart. Black and White are for boring silent movies, boring exam papers and booooooooooring people.. It gives me a headache and reminds of the zebra which bite me at Bannergatta (I swear I didn't provoke him!!)

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S: I've lost track of the post scripts and I'm so have you...it's fun know :D :D :D...why follow rules always?

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S: Not one person to date has asked me what happened to Saturday in my very first post on this blog...hmm was the rambling that winding or are the people just generally so used to blurring out things?

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S: I'm never ever going to have to be jealous of people who even after Ramayan- length posts manage to have vocab left to put post scripts...tada see I have a solution for everything ;-) ;-) ..I made a bulleted post into one filled with PSs...:-p..

Now to the actual post...was up all night helping a project to go live on the VF telecom waves somewhere far away in the colonial world...even after this you want to me write an actual post!!! Take a hike, will you?